Are you a single Christian?
We live in a society where life, for many of us, is defined by our relationships. In pursuing a job, I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase, “it’s who you know.” Whether we’re consciously aware or not, much of how others view us & our value is based on our relationships…”who you know.” Some examples of those relationship might be who your parents are, people you’ve worked with, teachers or professors you’ve studied under and, perhaps, any VIPs in your community you know.
While we know that Christ calls us to be, “separate from the world,” (Romans 12:2; 2 Corinthians 6:17) it may surprise you to learn this is one point where Jesus agrees with the world…it really is all about, “who you know.”
“This is eternal life, that they may know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom You have sent.” (John 17:3)
The world is absolutely right when they tell you it’s, “who you know.” Where they’ve gone wrong is in telling you who/what it is that you must know. The world tells you that “life” is in/with “so & so”/”such & such” True life, eternal life, is to know the true & eternal living God thru the person of Jesus Christ.
To be “known” by God is to be in intimate relationship with God. In Genesis 4:1, “…Adam knew Eve, his wife; and she conceived…” Adam did not merely know about Eve; he had intimacy with her. The result of their intimacy was that Eve became pregnant. Marriage is the institution God established to be a reflection of the intimacy He has with His people. You don’t need to be married to be in intimate relationship with God…to be “known” by God.
“Now the word of the LORD came to me saying, ‘Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, And before you were born I consecrated you; I have appointed you a prophet to the nations.’” (Jeremiah 1: 4-5)
God had intimacy with Jeremiah before he was even born. Thus, our ability to have intimacy with God is not based on what we do – it’s based on what God has done for us in Jesus Christ.
Your value doesn’t come from whether or not you are married or are on a path towards marriage. No other human being can give you “eternal life” (not even a spouse). Your value comes from knowing God through Christ.
Remember that Jesus was a single man. Jesus lived a perfect life (2 Corinthians 5:21), and He didn’t need to get married to do it. “Life” doesn’t begin when you get married, or even when you find the person that you want to marry. “Life” begins when you “know” God in Jesus Christ.
The Apostles (the men Jesus used to change the world) were, by and large, single men. Their value as human beings was not based on their relationship status. Their value was based on their faithfulness to the mission that Christ gave them to spread the gospel.
In addition, John the Baptist was a single man – consider what Jesus said about him. “Truly I say to you, among those born of women there has not arisen anyone greater than John the Baptist! Yet the one who is least in the kingdom of heaven is greater than he.” (Matthew 11:11). The man described as the greatest human being by Jesus Himself was a single man.
I hope that you take away from this that singleness doesn’t hinder your life. You’re not “missing out.” In fact, with respect to being in service to God, singleness has certain advantages over marriage. As a single person, you have more time to pray, study and serve. You also have more money, time and energy to give in seeing God’s work come to pass in your life compared to your married friends.
So, how do you know if you’re called to be single? You really don’t…you have to trust God.
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight. Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the LORD and turn away from evil. It will be healing to your body and refreshment to your bones. Honor the LORD from your wealth and from the first of all your produce; so your barns will be filled with plenty and your vats will overflow with new wine. My son, do not reject the discipline of the LORD or loathe His reproof, for whom the LORD loves He reproves, even as a father corrects the son in whom he delights.” (Proverbs 3: 5-12)
The world will judge you on your relationships, but Christ will judge you on His relationship to you.
So, how do you know if you know Jesus Christ? The Bible says that, “…if anyone loves God, he is known by Him.” (1 Corinthians 8:3) If your love for God is true, Jesus has said that you will keep His commandments (John 14:15, 21). By being obedient and faithful to Christ, you demonstrate the authenticity of your love for Him, and you can rest assured that He knows you and loves you.